I did not know what to expect as I approached the Victorian building finding my way into Neal’s office. I was there for an interview with a Rolfer Bodyworker to see if we were a fit to work together. Wearing a prosthetic on my left leg since I was nine years old, I was told I would have to learn how to live with chronic back pain. Now at 24 I had, had enough of the pain and sought out Rolfing as a possible solution.
Well, I can’t say that Neal had me at hello, but what he said to me ten minutes in had me ready to sign up right then and there. He said, “ Part of what contributes to your pain, is there is an imbalance between your left and right sides. You’ve relied on your right side to hold you up, you’ve relied on your masculine to support you, to balance you.”
“What, I have a masculine and feminine side?” In that moment I was given an understanding about myself I didn’t even know I needed. Twelve weeks and twelve Rolfing Sessions later, Neal had gracefully and lovingly opened me up on the left side of my body, into my feminine. Thus began my journey towards softening and trusting my feminine to support me.
Growing up, I did not have a mother or sister that made me feel safe, that instilled in me a trust of the feminine aspect as a safe place to lean into. Having to learn to do this for myself added tremendously to the Elder Wisdom I share now with younger women as their over reliance on the inner and outer masculine has reached a boiling point with many of them, creating burnout from thinking and believing they need to rely on the masculine in order to be successful.
If you are a women reading this, you may be questioning, how would I even know what is true for me? Is it possible that I have an over reliance on masculine energy?
The following observations and conclusions are based on my over 35 years as a therapist, so allow me help you get clear on what I mean.
First of all, if you have an over reliance on masculine energy, then you are enrolled in something of which you may not even be aware. I call it the The Big Lie. In just one sentence, here is what the Big Lie is: