Talk to Strangers My most precious moments of the week are my Sunday mornings on our back deck with the New York Times and the SF Chronicle. This Sunday was one of those mornings, when the temperature is just right, not too hot, with just the right amount of chill in the air. I don’t …
I did not know what to expect as I approached the Victorian building finding my way into Neal’s office. I was there for an interview with a Rolfer Bodyworker to see if we were a fit to work together. Wearing a prosthetic on my left leg since I was nine years old, I was told I would have to learn how to live with chronic back pain. Now at 24 I had, had enough of the pain and sought out Rolfing as a possible solution.
Well, I can’t say that Neal had me at hello, but what he said to me ten minutes in had me ready to sign up right then and there. He said, “ Part of what contributes to your pain, is there is an imbalance between your left and right sides. You’ve relied on your right side to hold you up, you’ve relied on your masculine to support you, to balance you.”
“What, I have a masculine and feminine side?” In that moment I was given an understanding about myself I didn’t even know I needed. Twelve weeks and twelve Rolfing Sessions later, Neal had gracefully and lovingly opened me up on the left side of my body, into my feminine. Thus began my journey towards softening and trusting my feminine to support me.
Growing up, I did not have a mother or sister that made me feel safe, that instilled in me a trust of the feminine aspect as a safe place to lean into. Having to learn to do this for myself added tremendously to the Elder Wisdom I share now with younger women as their over reliance on the inner and outer masculine has reached a boiling point with many of them, creating burnout from thinking and believing they need to rely on the masculine in order to be successful.
If you are a women reading this, you may be questioning, how would I even know what is true for me? Is it possible that I have an over reliance on masculine energy?
The following observations and conclusions are based on my over 35 years as a therapist, so allow me help you get clear on what I mean.
First of all, if you have an over reliance on masculine energy, then you are enrolled in something of which you may not even be aware. I call it the The Big Lie. In just one sentence, here is what the Big Lie is:
In a world full of ‘how to’ books, programs, coaching and workshops… I Release! – The Course is not any of those. I Release! – The Course is not filled with strategies, check lists, borrowed knowledge or steps that coax you into being the best version of yourself. In fact when we first sent our …
There is no pain in your life that cannot be relieved, no incident in your life from which you were never meant to heal, no heartache so great you cannot be free of its grip, no lack that cannot be replaced by unlimited abundance and no emptiness so deep that it cannot be filled by …
I am often asked why I see the value of going into our past to understand or succeed in what we are trying to create for ourselves in the present. Why is it necessary to do some archeological unpacking when all we want to do is move forward? Why is it necessary to go into …
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In my first few years of being married to my husband Hugh, I found myself saying this phrase quite often, especially in the newlywed phase. It was a profound consolation to me, realizing that the actual alchemical process of love demanded that everything that was in the way of love insisted it be seen in …
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In the previous post I spoke about our hidden ‘no.’ This quote by Michael Port expresses exquisitely the impact of our hidden ‘no’. It is a concept that can be difficult to grasp. When people hear they have a hidden ‘no’, it can sound to them like an undiagnosed illness, making them shy about uncovering …
The champagne has been popped, the ball in Times Square has dropped, the noisemakers that rang in the New Year are now quiet, and we sit in these first few days of 2022 contemplating the gift of a New Year! After the turmoil of what we have lived through these past 2 years, do we …
I’ve always been the kind of person who gets to the bottom of things. It is what I am known for. Hugh calls me a terrier with a rat. It is not uncommon when I am working with a couple and the interaction is getting crunchy, to just come right out and ask, “What’s really …
Last week I had the honor of working with a group of people who had formed a book club where they supported one another in working through all of the processes in our book; I Release! Create the Life That Makes Your Heart Sing. It was started a year ago by a woman who attended …
I have been witnessing something in my practice that I feel represents a bigger trend that is happening in the culture. It started off gradually over the years, but presently, the majority of the straight women in my practice are the main breadwinners of their family. According to recent statistics 50% of women in the …
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There is a price for everything. Whether we eat one slice of chocolate cake or if we eat the whole cake. With cake, the cost is in pounds. On the other hand if we find ourselves isolated or lonely, the cost of risking, reaching out, may be opening our hearts from years of it being …
Take a breath and imagine someone saying to you: “You shouldn’t feel that way.” “You’re too sensitive.” “Get over it.” Feel what happens inside when these words hit you. These are three of the most powerful sentences you can hear from someone – especially a person who supposedly loves you – when you are sharing …
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With a raised voice my therapist reminded me, ” But he drove drunk, he put your life in danger!” This was in response to me brushing her off by saying, “But everyone drove drunk back then!” She persisted saying, “But because of your father’s irresponsibility, you now are missing a leg.” I began to feel the …
We are impacted by one another in ways that are more common place than mystical. So much happens to us when we are in the presence of another human being that goes unacknowledged. The exchange of energy that was once relegated to the metaphysical is now easily explained through the scientific evidence of how hormones …
Today we transition from the Year of the Monkey, to the Year of the Rooster. You may be experiencing the last lash of the monkey’s tail as it departs 2016. The monkey, the merry prankster left many of us with the feeling of being punked personally and globally. Entering the new year we take an inhale. …
Each day in my office I’m honored to have a front row seat to the challenges of what it means to be human. For so many of my clients, 2016 delivered those challenges in spades. This only confirms to me that the pace of human evolution has intensified. There was a commonality in the themes …
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Boy, could my mother sing! She had great pitch, timing, and phrasing. And she loved to sing. She would belt out those romantic songs from her era: “Because of You,” “All of Me,” “Always.” She would even sing to me in my crib to comfort me. Even before I arrived on the scene, my mother …
For years I have stood in this intention for myself and my clients: “There is no pain in your life that cannot be relieved, no incident in your life from which you were never meant to heal, no heartache so great you cannot be free of its grip, no lack that cannot be replaced by …
The first time I heard it sung was in my living room. We gathered around our black and white set to see the first black man in America with his own TV show. When Nat King Cole walked on stage his face was compelling to look at. I could not take my eyes off of …